i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
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