I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
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