You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
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