i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I enjoy the company of your penis
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
