Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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