Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Send help, water and tortillas.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
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