In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
My dad is sitting where you rode me
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
