Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
