forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize