I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize