Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Randomize
