I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
