Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize