There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Come on in and take your pants off
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