We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
tonight lets celebrate not being married
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
