mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
