My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
