glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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