I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Randomize
