Reflecting on last night, I'm not sure if making out with a 43 y/o married woman at Bernie's after the Cubs game was my best life decision...
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Randomize
