It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
