Pregnant stripper...not hot.
dude i'm inner monologue high
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize