Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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