There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
