have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Randomize
