Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
