ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
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