he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
