my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
