Are we in a gay sports bar?
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
