yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Randomize
