My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Randomize
