She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
operation harelip BJ is a go
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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