You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize