How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
Church boner. Awkwardddd
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Vodka?
Forever.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Randomize
