there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
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