she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
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