meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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