Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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