if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Randomize
