Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
