You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
