ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Randomize
