It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
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