why didn't you poke me back
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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