plz talk dirty to me
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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