If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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