Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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