The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
