I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
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