Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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